Now.

It was just a moment. Another one of those times where everything else matters. Only, I wish it didn't. Those moments where I wish I could disappear and just be left alone. Alone and out of sight, even just for a minute. Unfortunately, that never happens. The chance to leave unnoticed never presents itself. And once again, I'm stuck in this moment.

534

I wonder if the past is repeating itself to send a message. Maybe. But then again, maybe I'm just making connections that aren't really there. Maybe I'm just picturing the strange looks and raised eyebrows. Maybe I'm just trying to place myself right back into the back seat. Then again, maybe I've never left.

disagree

Why do we even have rules? What's the point in having a policy when it can be easily broken as soon as someone raises their voice. Of course.. that someone is never me, because I'm supposed to be the calm one, the one who says 'yes of course' and 'I completely understand'. See.. that's where the problem occurs. I don't like to be wrong. Actually, I don't like to be wrong when I know for sure that I am right. This is a terrible combination as I love to argue to prove my point and will not stop until the other person gives up.. usually. Anyway, back to rules. . I hate exceptions to the rules. I hate making exceptions to the rules. My job is to explain the rules and calmly state why they can't be broken as I maintain eye contact, nod and smile. Lovely. Now, that would be simple, as well as fake, but I have to consider the fact that the other person's reaction can't be predicted. They will either feel bad and give up or turn various shades of purple and start yelling and insisting that I am wrong. The rules are all wrong. They should be broken for the 'right people'. They should be broken or else. Or else they will never come see me again... Okay... See.. I don't really care.. I'm not allowed to say that, but if I could speak my mind to these strangers it would be quite interesting to say the least. That was basically my weekend at customer service. It's a shame I manage to stay calm. There is such potential for out of the ordinary reactions from both parties. Anyway, all this to say, if I had my way, there would be no exceptions whatsoever.

Other than that, the summer has brought a bunch of projects. Most of them are still half finished or planned out. My enthusiasm for a project usually dies about halfway through. The exception to this is that I was able to finish sewing my first non-patterned article of clothing. Please ignore that use of the word 'exception'. I still need to finish about 5 other 'projects' before the summer is up. Knowing me, I will just end up adding more to that list and have twice as many unfinished ones by the time school starts. Bad idea. At least it's only June. I have all summer to finish them. . when I find the time.